Short Story: Feedback.

I have to write a short story for English and I need some feedback part way; Thx> <3 Gold

“It was a gruesome murder,” the prosecutor said, “this man... In this room... murdered 3 people. 3 Days. He tortured them. He Stripped them of their dignity. Jury, do your duty!” he pleaded, “He is a man that does not deserve to live. The pain he has caused the families of three young people is unprecedented. When he dies, the three families will have their piece of mind. They can finally sleep...”

The prosecutor finished. The Judged boomed over the stone silent courtroom, “Jurors, you have heard the cases for 22 days. You 12 people will soon finish the duty you have been given. A right of this amazing nation. You 12 people will make the final decision. I hope you make the right one.” The judge finished. “All Rise” The court officer said. There was a slight shuffiling sound as the 12 jurors, 6 men, 6 women. 5 Black, 6 White, 1 Hispanic. One of these was Steve Bergdall. An old retired military general from the Vietnam War. The scars of the war was shown deep in his face. The bright blue eyes were the only light in what was once a happy, life filled man.

“Court is now adjourned.” The Judged finished with a pound on his gavel.

“The People vs Alec Rice was the most emotional case that I have seen in 10 years,” said a CNN Panel Member. “
“What do you think the verdict will be?” asked the news anchor.
“Definitely Guilty; The evidence that the prosecution brought up was just overwhelming. The defense did bring up a strong case, but there were some flaws in the letters that Mr. Rice sent to the families.” The Panel member finished.
“What would happen if he is found Not Guilty?” asked the news anchor with the producer pulling out his hair because the news anchor was going onto overtime.
“I would be incredibly surprised as I have just stated previously...” He was interrupted by Michael Jones, a defense attorney for the Peter Griffin vs New York State case.
“Mr...” He stuttered,”Paula?”
“Correct” Mr Paula replied.
“My apologies.” Michael Continued...
“Why were there flaws in the letters? It was pretty solid evidence.”
“Well... they could not bring up a good argument. The defense had the evidence to say he didn't do it. The way that they set it up was just wrong.”
“Ah Okay.”
“We will be right back after the break. Don't go, we have new developments about Justin Bieber and his recent allegations” The news anchor finished.

The room was dark and damp. The 12 jurors were stone statues going over the evidence. A juror stated, “All of the evidence does look right! The letters, the GPS locations, everything!”
“But! What about the phone calls? What about the police report? Alec had clear intention of calling the police!” said another juror.
“Well lets look over the phone calls, the GPS locations, the police report. Everything!” Steve said finally.
“Okay.” all of the jurors agreed.
“Officer, we request State Exhibition: 1,5,9,25,105 and 306 and Defense Exhibit: 5,25,39 and 42. We would also request any slide shows related to evidence #012-999-State.” Said Juror number One.
“Yes Madame” Said the officer. The door shut.

It was 9 hours 25 minutes and 32 seconds and 32 fried rice boxes after deliberation began. The jurors were in the middle of the key 911 call; Evidence 5 of the Defense:
911: 911 Please state your emergency
Alec: I heard 9 gunsho-
Two More
Alec: Make that 11 at 32 Street and 3rd Avenue
911: Sir, what is your name
Alec: Alec Rice
-Call Ended-

“That was quick.” said juror 4.
“Very.” replied another.
“So what happened in this phone call?” inquired juror 7, a lawer.
“9 then 11 gunshots,” said Steve.
“Correct,” she replied.
“Well that provides reasonable doubt!” yelled a juror.
Almost everyone nodded. A seed was planted.
“Okay, Guilty or Not Guilty?”
“Guilty” Juror One
“Guilty” Juror Two
“Not Guilty” Steve Bergdall
“Not Guilty” Juror Four
“Guilty” Juror Five
“Guilty” Juror Six
“Not Guilty” Juror Seven
“Guilty” Juror Eight
“Not Guilty' Juror None
“Guilty” Juror Ten
“Guilty” Juror Eleven
“Guilty” Juror Twelve

“Okay 8 to 4” said juror number seven.
“But why is there reasonable doubt?” Steve Asked. “Who fired the shots?”
“To me it sounds it was from afar.” Said juror seven.
“The first 9. What about the other two. They sounded VERY close!”
A note Steve makes:
The first 911 call I heard, 9 gun shots that were near the bodies.
The Second call from Alec, it was very close.
“The first 911 call we heard, 9 gun shots that were near the bodies. The Second call from Alec, it was very close.” Said Steve. The 3 other hold ups looked like a brick hit them.
“There. The connection!” Said juror One.
There was then arguments over if the 9 gunshots actually was from Steve.
“Guys!” said Steve
“Everybody Order!” He was going back to his old military days.
The room went silent.
Steve Began his mololouge.
“We are here to do our duty. To ensure justice for the common man. Arguing over one little piece of evidence does nothing. Absolutely nothing. We are being apart of an amazing justice system. Where the people, you and me, take part in ensuring justice is being upheld. You all have taken an oath; "Do you and each of you solemnly swear that you will well and truly try and a true deliverance make between the United States and the defendant at the bar, and a true verdict render according to the evidence, so help you God? Allah? Vishnu? You, as jurors, are the judges of the facts. But in determining what actually happened–that is, in reaching your decision as to the facts–it is your sworn duty to follow all of the rules of law as I explain them to you.You have no right to disregard or give special attention to any one instruction, or to question the wisdom or correctness of any rule I may state to you. You must not substitute or follow your own notion or opinion as to what the law is or ought to be. It is your duty to apply the law as I explain it to you, regardless of the consequences. However, you should not read into these instructions, or anything else I may have said or done, any suggestion as to what your verdict should be. That is entirely up to you. It is also your duty to base your verdict solely upon the evidence, without prejudice or sympathy. That was the promise you made and the oath you took. Whether you are gay or straight. Black or white. You are being apart in a very important system. You all have been gathered here today to decide whether a man lives or dies. His life is in your/our hands. We all must make an informed decision of guilty or not guilty. We all must work together to decide whether a man has 60 years of his life left. Or just 20. Arguing is not the answer. We must discuss as civilized people every piece of evidence. Whether it will take us 3 hours. 3 days. 3 weeks or even 3 months. His life is in YOUR hands.”
The room was silent.

Chapter Two
Deliberation Continued

The speech sunk into the jurors. Everyone of them had stone faces staring into Steve. A blink here, a blink there. Juror 7, Sydney, said,”Okay. We will do as we have been asked to.”
Another juror agreed. “Yes, we will.”
“Okay,” said Steve, “Lets continue.”

A news reporter was outside the New York City courthouse,
“It has been 3 days, 7 hours, and 52 minutes since the jury went into dilerberation. What do you think the verdict will be?”
A panel member said, “By now, I think there is a slight chance of Not Guilty. If you look at past cases such as Zimmerman, I think the jury will decide Not Guilty.”
“Ok.”

“Okay, lets look at the letters Alec sent to Stacy 3 days before.” Said Juror 1.

Dear Stacy,
I have been meaning to tell you that I absolutely miss you. It has been 4 months since I have been stationed in Fort Knox and I haven't heard from you in ages!
Please reply, thx.
Alec.

“Okay that was the first one out of four.” juror one continued.

Dear Stacy,
It has been 2 years and you still haven't replied. No Christmas, no birthday, no nuthin'. I am thinking of wanting to come back to you soon.
Alec

“It looks like he has become more attached to Stacy.” Sydney pointed out. The other jurors agreed. Steve's old wartime memories became more vivid.

Dear Stacy,
I have decided to quit the military.
Alec

“That shows clear intent!” said Steve. The jurors nodded.
“In other evidence, it shows that he has become more attached and shows that if she fought back, Alec would've killed her. Especially, he would have been enraged at her for days at end. Unleashing that anger onto other people.” Sydney continued.
“Okay, lets right down our verdict.” she finished.
A small piece of paper was handed to each juror. Steve wrote down; Not Guilty. He was the only one. A flash back happened.

“Steve, we need you to go right, NOW!” said a voice in the background. There were gunshots everywhere. “NOW!” the voice continued. Steve, a foot solider then was finishing a letter to his wife.
“Steve!” “Steve!”

“Steve!” Juror 3 said.
“Wh-what!”
“We need your paper.”
“Oh sorry!”
“Okay” Juror one said holding 12 pieces of paper. “Guilty. Guilty. Guilty. Not Guilty. Guilty...” So 11 to one.” Everyone head's smashed on the table.
“We've been in this god damn room for 4 days now!” juror one said. The clock stuck 8 p.m. “Finally!” He continued. Day 4. The jury room was then emptied and the jurors were brought back to their hotel rooms.